soin lore
all the information you need about soin and his stupid family
written with love by soumathepng and soddy
carrd by soddy
soin facts
* he is one of the many offspring of the rather poor but large kanzaki family.
* he was the 72th child. the youngest and the runt of the litter.
* everyone hates him apart from his twin sister soinette 🎀 who is the only female of the pack (besides airi) so no one likes her because theyre sexists
* he is like 4 ft and weighs 2kg because hes made of cotton buds (mummy had a food shortage when she was pregnant she relied on cotton buds.)
* he is. 6
* he is a massive crybaby
* he sucks his thumb because mummy dosent let him suck her nipple anymore because thw first time he bit it so hard it fell off and he ate it.
* his dad left him
* zok
* unlike the other kanzakis he was born on the 21st of april because hes stupid
* his IQ is -10990017
* he does not know his ABCS
* Can't read
* he levitates on friday
* he wants to go out and play with everyone
* Soin's favourite song is Dance Monkey.
* wq ist
* fuci yoi
* soins best friend is Mister
* it is illegal to use a capital letter at the start of soins name (because he is not important) if typing in all caps it must be typed like sOIN
* soins full name is "soin cough hugie"
kanzaki facts
* all the offspring are called souma apart from soin and soinette🎀
* the event called "THE BIG ZANZAKI BIRTH INCIDENT 4/20 1948" is when the kanzakis were all born. 108,989 children were born that day.
* there are 72 in total kept by the family (108,917 were sold to area 51. no one knows what happened to them in there.)
* all were born on 20th of april (excluding soin) by zingles kanzaki
* One of the offspring ran away (73rd) his name was Tobias. Is presumed dead.
* all 108,989 children (excluding soin) were shot out of the vagina like a machine gun. the birthing process took 1 hour. soin was born 17 hours later because he was stuck.
* All Kanzaki Members have a special talent of synchronised twerking. Except Soin. he tries though.
* the kanzaki family has a massive football pitch sized hall in their house with 72 trampolines installed and strobe lights and a stage for the kanzakis to do their synchronised twerking and special jumping. it happens at 12pm sharp every day. those who do not attend get intense torture for 24 hours straight by the torture machine 3000.
* the twerking hall is why the kanzakis are broke.
* the older kanzakis work at primark sweatshops. souma kanzaki used to work at a sweatshop but he illegally left to be an idol. so did airi momoi, but she isnt allowed in a sweatshop because shes pink. their family despise them both because of it.
* a lot of the offspring are not human. most of them were sent to area 51
* zingles has a lot of sex
* souma kanzaki v was renamed to airi momoi, she dosent look like one of the kanzakis so they changed her.
* most kanzakis look identical. but some have changed themself or just came out looking fucking different. some might make yoi question if theyre really a kanzaki.
* souma kanzaki has a random m&m in his bellybutton. its green.
* a lot of the kanzakis are cannibals
* the kanzaki house is actually a large abandoned mental hospital that they took over without asking
* W̜͎̠̻̫̭͕̯̾ͥͪ͑͛̄ͪ̕͡͝O̷̞̙͉͒ͨ͑͌̾̎̑͐Ơ̸̠͎̮̭͑̿ͦD̦̮̲̠̠͛͋ͥ͐ͤͯ̓̀P̷͖͈͙̳ͯ̄̾ͤ̌ͥͯ̅Ȩ̝̬͇̳͉̙̭̝̽ͥͮ͘͜C͇͔͔͚ͣͭ̋͑͊͋̐̚K̲̠͖̙̘̃̂ͨͩ̅ͪ̾̊E̲̲̻̣̬̳̮ͬ͌̓ͨR̶̻̮̜ͮ̿̕͝ͅ ̭̯̪͗̊͛̄ͮ̒ͤ͢͜͠D̦͎͙͑̃͆̿͑͒̓̊̍̕͢͢D̫̪̻̺̜̙͚͖͆̑ͦ̈́̄ͪ̄̂͘̕ͅD̥̦̈́ͫ̌̄̌D̀ͤ̀̆̊̃͏̯̘͓̥͓D̨̯̠̲͕ͥͦ̎̽̔̾ is straight from hell. he is constantly on fire and has a terrifying appearance. he is rather nightmarish. no one knows if hes actually a kanzaki or not but no one wants to know.
the kanzakis
The Kanzaki Family1. Zonk Kanzaki
2. Zingles Kanzaki (maiden name: Ziiiiing)
3. Petulia Kanzaki (grandmother)
4. Zangi Kanzaki (grandfather)
5. Z (third cousin in law twice removed)
6. mai, pronounce she/star (soumas almost identical cousin. she is morbidly obese.)Offspring(in order of birth)1. Souma Kanzaki 0
2. Souma Kanzaki A
3. Souma Kanzaki B
4. Souma stacy kamego jamie (it/its/😁😀📆)
5. Souma Kanzaki D
6. Kanzaki (Yes) Souma
7. Souma Kanzaki E
8. Souma Kanzaki F
9. Souma Kanzaki G
10. katy perry
11. Souma Kanzaki I
12. Souma Kanzaki j
13. Souma Kanzaki (the hated one)
14. Souma Kanzaki K
15. Souma Kanzaki L
16. nope 🐖
17. Souma Kanzaki N
18. AQWU-6WW2PQ-PQ4BV
19. Souma Kanzaki P
20. 颯馬神崎
21. Souma Kanzaki Q
22. Souma Kanzaki R
23. BOTTLE
24. Souma Kanzaki T
25. virgin
26. Airi momoi (kanzaki)
27. Souma Kanzaki W
28. ANgRy ####
29. Souma Kanzaki Z
30. SOUMA KAN3AKI
31. fanny
32. KANZAKI SOUMA
33. Souma Kanzaki jr
34. Kanzaki Souma jr
35. Bronchiolitus
36. Souma Kanzaki !
37. do do do do tc
38. Souma Kanzaki @
39. Souma Kanzaki &
40. pound🆘
41. Souma Kanzaki (
42. Souma Kanzaki )
43. Souma Kanzaki ;
44. Souma Kanzaki :
45. eü ü😕
46. Souza
47. Souma Kanzaki .
48. Souma Kanzaki ,
49. Souma Kanzaki '
50. Búbbåløø
51. Souma Kanzaki ~
52. Souma Kanzaki
53. 666..W̜͎̠̻̫̭͕̯̾ͥͪ͑͛̄ͪ̕͡͝O̷̞̙͉͒ͨ͑͌̾̎̑͐Ơ̸̠͎̮̭͑̿ͦD̦̮̲̠̠͛͋ͥ͐ͤͯ̓̀P̷͖͈͙̳ͯ̄̾ͤ̌ͥͯ̅Ȩ̝̬͇̳͉̙̭̝̽ͥͮ͘͜C͇͔͔͚ͣͭ̋͑͊͋̐̚K̲̠͖̙̘̃̂ͨͩ̅ͪ̾̊E̲̲̻̣̬̳̮ͬ͌̓ͨR̶̻̮̜ͮ̿̕͝ͅ ̭̯̪͗̊͛̄ͮ̒ͤ͢͜͠D̦͎͙͑̃͆̿͑͒̓̊̍̕͢͢D̫̪̻̺̜̙͚͖͆̑ͦ̈́̄ͪ̄̂͘̕ͅD̥̦̈́ͫ̌̄̌D̀ͤ̀̆̊̃͏̯̘͓̥͓D̨̯̠̲͕ͥͦ̎̽̔̾
54. Souma Kanzaki +
55. Souma Kanzaki =
56. Souma Kanzaki ]
57. Donky
58. Souma Kanzaki %
59. octobah 🤾♀️🍂
60. Souma Kanzaki * (Russian)
61. Souma Kanzaki
62. Soot
63. Souma Kanzaki >
64. Souma Kanzaki :)
65. Souma Kanzaki :( (legal name wind)
66. Souma Kanzaki |
67. Souma Kanzaki 🏂
68. souma kanzaki 📆
69. Souma Kanzaki...
70. magic
71. Soinette 🎀
72. soin (most hated)
(Not including the ones who were sent away, only the ones that live in the Kanzaki Household.)
the life of soin
the life of soin
chapter one - the big kanzaki birth incident 4/20 1948Soin's mum screamed in unbearable not-worth-it pain as she pushed and pushed. thousands of babies were shooting out. 500 babies (some grown men) a second. Her husband,by her side as he held her sweaty crusty hand daydreaming about the divorce papers he will sign ASAP. many baby boy was born. as they were born the mauve haired organisms were flung into the bouncy castle specially provided by Bouncy Monkeys Bouncy Castle Hire Hastings Bexhill™️ zingles watched from the opening of her baby shooting hole as her beautiful (not) creations were flung out at 80 MPH. she wasnt sure if they were all coming from her vagina and not some of her other holes. because if this she thought to herself "thats why i havent been able to shit or piss for 38 years...". the proud, new mother continued watching, tears flowing from her tired face. she knew she would have a mad world record from this event. just over a long hour later, 108,988
organisms were born, some adults, some babies, a lot not human, many with birth defects, some conjoined twins, but they all had things in common. everyone had purple hair, purple eyes and a penis (micropenis to be specific.) but there was one who was female and wearing a bow. zingles said weakly, "shes called soinette 🎀" and zonk replied "with the bow emoji?" "yes" replied zingles, an awkward silence occurred then broken by zingles who said, "i shall call him souma." then zonk remarked "which one?" "all of them." zingles said with a weird smile.
her ugly husband sat next to her on the hospital bed, taking a better look at his wifes pussy. "its ripped all the way to your anus dear" he whispered, making sure he didn't startle the hundred thousand organisms in the Bouncy Monkeys Bouncy Castle™️ The wife looked at the love of her life and smiled weakly. "now i understand why doctors hate uterus removal surgery so much. i have created an endless generation" zonk nodded, he was very excited that now zingles no longer has many organisms inside her so she can get back to cleaning. oh boy he was excited.
zingles was very tired after an hour of being a baby gun, (its a very hard job you know) so she had a long, 17 hour nap. but she suddenly woke up wide eyed and liquid immediately shot out her extremely, incredibly, world record dilated vagina. she shrieked, "AHHHHHHHHH ZOOOONKKK MY WATER BROKE AGAIN!!!!!" zonk ran into the room. he was in the middle of a 2 minute wee and he had no time to pull up his boxers so his willy with piss still coming out was just dangling around like crazy from running. "ZINGLES!!!! YOU HAVE MORE???" he yelled, looking up into zingle's gaping hole to see a small, ugly baby right in the corner of her womb. zonk just wanted to get it over and done with because its been a long day. so he body slammed himself onto zingles stomach. the baby came shooting out but it missed the Bouncy Monkeys Bouncy Castle™️ and bonked his head. (none of the other 108,988 offsprings missed.) zonk picked up the baby and it was so ugly that he was about to puke. so he opened the babies mouth and puked into it. baby swallowed it. zonk then examined the hideous baby, he noticed a massive wart on his ass and puked in the babys mouth again. zonk grajbed some dark blue primary school scissors and cut it off and threw it over to zingles who barely caught the baby. this ones willy was even smaller than the others.
after having a good stare at the baby, zingles said "i call it soin. i hate him already." zonk said "ok"
Soin's dad put his arm around her as they glared their ugly baby(?). + There was a small fluff of dark purple hair at the top of his head. His eyes opened slowly to reveal hideous lavender pools that you would really want to poke so he goes blind.and now, soin and his 108,987 brothers and one sister has been born. cool.
soin official art
